So I'm doing this Campus Movie Fest thing at USC. It's a five minute short film competition, that I found out the day before it started and my friend Ayush asked me if I was interested.
Now, his question was most certainly not the catalyst in what may appear to be a sudden change from physics to film this semester. Instead I saw it as more so the straw that broke the camel's back. Over break, I was questioning a lot of the reasons behind the direction I was taking with my life.
Science, it's not easy by any means, but once you struggle for the 4 years of your undergrad and get that degree, job security, money flow and overall stability is pretty much guaranteed in America. The government is always going to want people who can make weapons or new high-tech computers. And maybe in the next decade or so they'll even start caring about alternative energy research. Just maybe.
However, over the past year and a half of doing research... I've realized that while my mind finds it absolutely fascinating, my excitement comes from reading articles and presenting my results. Not from actually performing the research. I actually found the process to be quite tiresome and uninteresting. Which is unfortunate because I've wanted to be a scientist since I was about seven years old.
And I could go into teaching, but I'm not the type of person who could honestly work a 9 to 5 job. I know that, my friends know that and I think even my family knows that. I do my best work when I'm allowed to throw all my time and energy into one project from start to finish and do it all in a burst. If I was a professor at a university, then I'd be doing fifty different projects at one time and not really going very far with any of them for years.
There's a lot of draw to film for me. There's the technical aspect of editing and understanding the mechanics to make a "pretty picture." But there's also this free will that goes along with the video camera. It's not the same as taking a picture, where you're trying to catch that one moment, which I completely respect because it's a difficult task to master.
But film is the before and after of that one moment. You develop an entire story or emotion or idea leading up to that pinacle "snapshot" moment and then you allow the subject to relax or fade to black or in the case of M. Night Shamalan twist and contort in every which way (not always with the best of results).
Film allows me to show others the way I see the world for however brief or long it may be. I haven't put a film together in two years after I committed myself to the realm of science. But I've felt unsatisfied for a long time and now I'm starting over from scratch. I'll be sure to be posting my by Tuesday, so be on the look out. It won't be anything spectacular, just me and one of my many inspirations having fun together.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Bye-Bye, Box
So with classes underway and having felt out my schedule for the first couple of days, I couldn't help but feel a little suffocated. Since my first day of class freshman year, I have felt like I was in a box. I tried decorating the box and bringing friends into the box, but when it came down to it... it was still just a box.
Having come into this semester with a new mind set, a new perspective and an old dream, I could finally see this box and felt frustrated that I would not be able to break out of it. And then today happened.
I had one of the most important conversations in my life with my dear friend and mentor Dr. Robyn. It was chance that we were able to see each other, and I doubt I will ever regret the next hour that passed by.
I told her everything that's been going through my mind over the past month: the stress of school, the pressure to do science, the need that I have to please everyone and never seeming to fully succeed. I told her about the dreams I would have as a little kid about these people I had never met and stories I had never heard. About these crazy thoughts and day dreams and doodles that I have notebooks filled with. And I told her about feeling like physics is where my mind is but not where my heart is.
So in the few hours before drop/add day was over, I made the decision that I'm going to take a break from physics this semester and do a little soul searching. I signed up for some media arts classes and am going to give film my time and dedication this semester. If nothing comes of it, then nothing comes of it, but for right now I feel like this is what my heart is telling me to do. My mind is fighting it, but for once in my life I'm not going to care what everyone else thinks and just do what I feel.
I had bad feelings about this semester and now I can't even go to sleep because I'm so excited about class tomorrow! If that's not indication enough that I made the right choice, then I don't know what is.
Right after I made my decision, I called Haviland (yesterday was our anniversary) and we talked for a bit. She mentioned how tomorrow is the first day of her senior year, and I couldn't help but think that tomorrow is the first day of my freshman year. One and half years of college down and I'm pretty much starting all over again and I honestly couldn't be happier.
I don't know what this semester will bring. I don't know what story I'm writing anymore. My outline is out the window and I almost feel as if I'm in the breeze with it. I'm going into tomorrow with an open mind and ready to tackle whatever comes into my way next.
Also, I've entered into this 5-minute movie contest thing, which starts in 10 hours. Man, this semester is like no other.
Having come into this semester with a new mind set, a new perspective and an old dream, I could finally see this box and felt frustrated that I would not be able to break out of it. And then today happened.
I had one of the most important conversations in my life with my dear friend and mentor Dr. Robyn. It was chance that we were able to see each other, and I doubt I will ever regret the next hour that passed by.
I told her everything that's been going through my mind over the past month: the stress of school, the pressure to do science, the need that I have to please everyone and never seeming to fully succeed. I told her about the dreams I would have as a little kid about these people I had never met and stories I had never heard. About these crazy thoughts and day dreams and doodles that I have notebooks filled with. And I told her about feeling like physics is where my mind is but not where my heart is.
So in the few hours before drop/add day was over, I made the decision that I'm going to take a break from physics this semester and do a little soul searching. I signed up for some media arts classes and am going to give film my time and dedication this semester. If nothing comes of it, then nothing comes of it, but for right now I feel like this is what my heart is telling me to do. My mind is fighting it, but for once in my life I'm not going to care what everyone else thinks and just do what I feel.
I had bad feelings about this semester and now I can't even go to sleep because I'm so excited about class tomorrow! If that's not indication enough that I made the right choice, then I don't know what is.
Right after I made my decision, I called Haviland (yesterday was our anniversary) and we talked for a bit. She mentioned how tomorrow is the first day of her senior year, and I couldn't help but think that tomorrow is the first day of my freshman year. One and half years of college down and I'm pretty much starting all over again and I honestly couldn't be happier.
I don't know what this semester will bring. I don't know what story I'm writing anymore. My outline is out the window and I almost feel as if I'm in the breeze with it. I'm going into tomorrow with an open mind and ready to tackle whatever comes into my way next.
Also, I've entered into this 5-minute movie contest thing, which starts in 10 hours. Man, this semester is like no other.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
1 + 1 = 2
So after two snow days and a 2 hour delay, I finally had my first day of classes. Modern Physics, Japanese and Philosophy of Science. And I was happily surprised at how interesting all my classes were.
Modern appears to be a bit more about the history of quantum theory as opposed to the actual derivations. But hey, how's complaining? Japanese was pretty laid back. There's only five of us in the class and I'm under the impression that as long as I keep up with the reading, there won't be too much to worry about in terms of understand.
I should note here that I'm taking the highest level Japanese class because the lower level one didn't fit my schedule (thank you Modern). So I'm a little bit nervous in terms of my comprehension level, but the challenge might be good for me.
And then Philosophy of Science... the source of my title for today. I'm starting to think this may be my fvaourite course for the semester. Right off the bat, we started delving into what categorizes a "theory" vs a "fact." And why science is unlike anything else humans have been involved with.
In all other types of philosophy, the outside world directly affects our thoughts, morality and the perspective with which we view ourselves. However, while the source of science may come from the external world, the results of science are of pure human conception. We change the world by changing our perspective. When a new theory replaces an old one, it's not just simply "correcting" our world view, but ultimately changing it.
There is no "right" or "wrong" answer for science. It is all about perspective and interpretation. And why there will always be debates amongst philosophers as far as classifying these questions, speculations, theories and "truths."
So while the idea of one object added to another object produces two objects came from the visual interpreation of counting, the actual constructs of 1, 2, + and = will have the same meanings regardless of what the external world does. In a sense, humans have created their own filter to process information from the random outside world in order to form a clearer concept. To use the cliche, humans essentially use science to make order from chaos.
So for all those Fairly Oddparent fans out there, Timmy nearly destroyed reality as we know it when he wished that 2 + 2 = 5! I feel as if we would have been safer if we'd gone with Cosmo's answer of 2 + 2 = FISH, mostly because of this beauty:
Modern appears to be a bit more about the history of quantum theory as opposed to the actual derivations. But hey, how's complaining? Japanese was pretty laid back. There's only five of us in the class and I'm under the impression that as long as I keep up with the reading, there won't be too much to worry about in terms of understand.
I should note here that I'm taking the highest level Japanese class because the lower level one didn't fit my schedule (thank you Modern). So I'm a little bit nervous in terms of my comprehension level, but the challenge might be good for me.
And then Philosophy of Science... the source of my title for today. I'm starting to think this may be my fvaourite course for the semester. Right off the bat, we started delving into what categorizes a "theory" vs a "fact." And why science is unlike anything else humans have been involved with.
In all other types of philosophy, the outside world directly affects our thoughts, morality and the perspective with which we view ourselves. However, while the source of science may come from the external world, the results of science are of pure human conception. We change the world by changing our perspective. When a new theory replaces an old one, it's not just simply "correcting" our world view, but ultimately changing it.
There is no "right" or "wrong" answer for science. It is all about perspective and interpretation. And why there will always be debates amongst philosophers as far as classifying these questions, speculations, theories and "truths."
So while the idea of one object added to another object produces two objects came from the visual interpreation of counting, the actual constructs of 1, 2, + and = will have the same meanings regardless of what the external world does. In a sense, humans have created their own filter to process information from the random outside world in order to form a clearer concept. To use the cliche, humans essentially use science to make order from chaos.
So for all those Fairly Oddparent fans out there, Timmy nearly destroyed reality as we know it when he wished that 2 + 2 = 5! I feel as if we would have been safer if we'd gone with Cosmo's answer of 2 + 2 = FISH, mostly because of this beauty:
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Snow Day
Well, it's doesn't snow in South Carolina everyday. Thus I deemed it appropriate and absolutely necessary to go outside at least THREE times today.
First, I went with my best mate Cathy Hardin to go and get in touch with our artistic side. The results weren't too terrible considering it was my first time using my new camera. Here's my favourite shot from my first session.
First, I went with my best mate Cathy Hardin to go and get in touch with our artistic side. The results weren't too terrible considering it was my first time using my new camera. Here's my favourite shot from my first session.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
日本語 (Japanese)
I haven't spoken much about my love of Japan. Now it's not all about having been an anime otaku back in my middle school days. Actually, after 9th grade, I really didn't watch much TV in general. So when I told my parents that I was going to take Japanese my freshman year of college, it came to them as quite a shock for a couple of different reasons. The first of which stemming from the fact that I was terrible at languages in high school.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Faith
Last night, I held a Qur'an for the first time in my life. One of the most amazing people I've met throughout my time as a Resident Mentor is my friend Arjamand, who just also happens to be Muslim.
But before I delve into this story, let me start with a little background about me.
But before I delve into this story, let me start with a little background about me.
Now Playing!
Lights... Camera... Action! That's the new theme for my hall this year. I came up with it while I was home over break after the realization that I would not be having a film class this semester. My new resident Taz and I started putting up the main decorations and I must say, they're looking pretty snazzy!
This work of beauty was my idea but made my by trusty side kick Taz. I think this block piece really captures the essence of film in 9 pieces of black construction paper, tape and a red dot. So have a look and I'll be posting updates as bits and pieces get completed. So that's all for tonight... Enjoy!
These are some of my many doordecks in the process of being made. I ended up making 23 of them. SO MUCH RUBBER CEMENT!!!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Down and Dirty with Diversity
So when I had Diversity training at USC back before the Fall semester it seriously lulled me to tears. Even if I hadn't literally just jumped off a plane from Tokyo, I think I would have still surrended to the mind numbing "Game Show" tactic used to try and teach Resident Mentors how to respect each others differences. What ensued was a lot of chuckles, snoring or right out disrespect for the people willing to share their stories. I stand guilty as charged.
However, today, it was different. There was no game show. There was no laughing. There was a big black screen telling us all the things that we didn't want to see or heard or think about. Every slander and prejudice the human race has ever managed to concoct was flashing before my eyes. Then the testimonies started. One by one, our fellow residents and staff began to tell their stories, each one a tear jerker.
However, today, it was different. There was no game show. There was no laughing. There was a big black screen telling us all the things that we didn't want to see or heard or think about. Every slander and prejudice the human race has ever managed to concoct was flashing before my eyes. Then the testimonies started. One by one, our fellow residents and staff began to tell their stories, each one a tear jerker.
New Semester
Alright so this is a snapshot of my textbooks for this coming semester. I have mixed feelings about how this semester is going to go. I'm jam packed with math and science, with a sliver of Japanese (it's that itty bitty coloring book between Modern and Calculus). This is my first semester without my beloved Baba-sensei as well as no film class to help balance out the stress on the left side of my brain. However, I have two great physics partners and I'm determined to make a success of this semester. With all that being said, please admire the sexy picture of Sir Isaac Newton on the cover of my Vector Calculus book.
Don't bother being jealous. None of us even stood a chance. This man was way too into academia to have time for the likes of mere mortals. 
New Year's Resolution - Getting Started
New Year's Resolutions. You know, those things that everyone sets at the beginning of January and most people are done with by beginning of February? Well, instead of my usual "eat healthier" and "run more often" promises, I'm going into this New Year with a little more forethought.
I like a lot of things, ranging from physics to film from linguistic theory to crazy little Pocket Monsters. I read more scientific journal and Wikipedia articles than pages from my text books. And I have an opinion on every movie I've ever watched and every bill trying to get passed in legislation.
The title of my blog doesn't mean I'm only going to talk about quantum mechanics or the latest Box Office hit, but instead it's supposed to encompass the huge range of topics floating around my head. Plus it's alliteration (throwing in some linguistic humor there).
So if you'll bare with me as I attempt to figure out this whole "blogger" thing, I promise that every now and then I may surprise you with an interesting story or two. Who knows? I might even get you to crack a smile or laugh (even if it's at my own expense).
I like a lot of things, ranging from physics to film from linguistic theory to crazy little Pocket Monsters. I read more scientific journal and Wikipedia articles than pages from my text books. And I have an opinion on every movie I've ever watched and every bill trying to get passed in legislation.
The title of my blog doesn't mean I'm only going to talk about quantum mechanics or the latest Box Office hit, but instead it's supposed to encompass the huge range of topics floating around my head. Plus it's alliteration (throwing in some linguistic humor there).
So if you'll bare with me as I attempt to figure out this whole "blogger" thing, I promise that every now and then I may surprise you with an interesting story or two. Who knows? I might even get you to crack a smile or laugh (even if it's at my own expense).
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